we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
It was a blind-side dick pic.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
The air taste purple.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
