yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
