..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize