Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
She tied me up with her honor cords...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
