I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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