it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
