Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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