you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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