So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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