nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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