Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
