i just had sex bonerless
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
So vagazzling was a success
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
