hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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