Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
