im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
