he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
