Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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