Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
