you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
