Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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