i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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