420 ftw
im drinking this country out of the recession.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize