Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
