In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
