so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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