he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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