Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
