I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Non-Jews are for practice
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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