you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
