My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
