so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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