he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
