My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I am one with the molecules
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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