meet me or not, i'm out of control
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
