my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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