Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
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