I'm laying in your front yard are you home
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
