A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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