You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
