Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
