And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
These tits shall not be calmed
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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