I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
