By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
