Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
