We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
