she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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