areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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