Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
