I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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