Buhtt sex?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
