Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
i think i just lost a toe
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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