If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
