using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he thought i was a dude.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
